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Football Season
By Dr. Johnny | September 9, 2007 
Ok guys, the season is about to start in two hours so I thought I would give you my outlook for the season and my predictions for all 32 teams! I LOVE FOOTBALL!!!
| TEAM | How I think they will play |
|---|---|
|
Indianapolis Colts |
Big Stars in the passing game but this team only does well if Addai runs the ball efficiently…and he will! |
|
Arizona Cardinals |
A young offense that will put p points. And they will need to cause their defense is shitty! |
|
Atlanta Falcons |
If Michael Vick has a good year…oh wait he will be in prison finding our what ‘"doggy style" really means! This is like Madden football. I like having a QB who can run, but the truth is he usually gets me in trouble. |
|
Baltimore Ravens |
As a lifelong Steeler fan I must admit I HATE THE RAVENS! With that being said; they have a good defense that is a year older and an offense that I still think wont do shit. NOTE: Willis McGAYhee will be a BUST this year! |
|
Buffalo Bills |
Yea they lost a lot of players but most of the guys they lost didn’t want to play there anyway. Its like having a girlfriend that says she wont break up with you but she refuses to blow you anymore…what do I need her for, when I can jerk off?! Yes, I just compared rookie linebackers to jerking off. |
|
Carolina Panthers |
This team will suprise some people this year because they will underachieve AGAIN! NOTE: By mid season Julius Peppers will fake an injury and in his free time make a rap album with Shag. |
|
Chicago Bears |
Good defense that can be overpowered at times. I think the surprise of the year is that this offense puts it together and the QB has a good year….no I am not fucking joking! |
|
Cincinnati Bengals |
My hatred for the Bungles is similar to that of the Ravens but to a lesser degree because the Bengals cant ever seem to get out of their own way. maybe the most talented and deepest offense in the AFC but I think I could put on pads and run for 100 yards against them. |
|
Cleveland Browns |
Oh the poor Browns. I wanna hate em, I really do. The problem with hating the Browns is that its almost like being in high school and picking on one of the guys in the band. He cant really fight back so what’s the point? |
|
Dallas Cowboys |
They have all the weapons. A good offense a solid attacking defense. Might be the most exciting team in the NFC. Too bad their coach is so boring. He might not take advantage of the opportunity. |
|
Denver Broncos |
Lots of off season spending, a rising star at QB and and incredible home field advantage means this team is one of the best in the AFC. |
|
Detroit Lions |
A strike from anywhere offense that I think is a few years away from being a real contender. they might be fun to watch though and if they every got tougher, look out. |
|
Green Bay Packers |
Oh when will Brett Favre retire. I say he plays til he’s 50…and this year they are a .500 team. |
|
Houston Texans |
Matt Shaub might be the real deal. Too bad this team needs a lot more help than that especially on the defensive side of the ball. By the way, imagine how good this offense would be if they had Reggie Bush! (I had to throw that in there!) |
|
Jacksonville Jaguars |
Another team I love to hate. The biggest team in the NFL but for all the size they have, they don’t have that bully mentality. If they had it they would be killers! |
|
Kansas City Chiefs |
What the hell is this team doing? I know they have Larry Johnson but the rest of the team is kinda like a yard sale. Its not gonna be pretty in K.C. |
|
Miami Dolphins |
I live in Miami but its hard to root for these guys. Bad management makes me feel bad for the players but I don’t think my sympathy will help them win more than 6 games. BRING MARINO BACK! |
|
Minnesota Vikings |
Another team that is going nowhere fast. I know they have a good offensive line and two stud RBs but their QB and WR core is Junior Varsity until proven otherwise. On top of that, they cant stop the pass on D. Its not gonna be pretty this year! |
|
New England Patriots |
Wow…I hate these guys more than anyone. Its cause they win and they do it out of sheer luck! Watching them play is like a bad poker day for me. you know when you keep getting pocket Kings and the lucky bastard next to you keeps getting Aces. The Patriots always have aces. But this year I say they don’t know how to play a big had. NINE WINS THIS YEAR AND NO PLAYOFFS! |
|
New Orleans Saints |
Great offense…so good in fact that everyone forgets that their O-Line is one injury away from being horrible and that their defense is one of the worst in the league. Forget about the Super Bowl. It will be hard to make it to 8-8 this year. |
|
New York Giants |
Another team that could go either way. I think Manning will be better this year and that Jacobs will make everyone forget who Tiki is but I think Strahan coming back to the team will hurt, not help his bunch. |
|
New York Jets |
Last year was no aberration. Mangini is a decent coach and his team believes in his bullshit. This year the Jets take that division from New England and make a decent playoff run. |
|
Oakland Raiders |
Another surprise this year. Lamont Jordon has a "Comeback Player of the Year" type of performance and Dante Culpepper fights him for the award. This team wins 9 or 10 games on the strength of their DEFENSE! |
|
Philadelphia Eagles |
Donovan McNaab will throw the ball so much this year that at years end Andie Reid has the team pay for a bionic throwing arm for Donovan. Ried then adopts McNaab as his legal son and McNaab gets addicted to crack. |
|
Pittsburgh Steelers |
My team is getting NO FUCKING CREDIT THIS YEAR!!! 11 wins for the rookie coach…watch. If he doesn’t win 11 with this team he should be fired! |
|
San Diego Chargers |
Norv Turner is a great offensive coordinator but a terrible head coach. Its OK cause this team is so good even Norv cant screw it up. Super Bowl contenders here. |
|
San Francisco 49ers |
The most improved team of the year in my opinion. Solid offense good run defense and a pass defense that should be improved. They win 10 games this year. |
|
Seattle Seahawks |
This is a desperate time for this team because as age creeps up on them they are decomposing right in front of us. the division is too tough and I dont think they have it in them this year. NO PLAYOFFS! |
|
St. Louis Rams |
A deep offense with a swiss cheese defense….they will be "fun to watch". Which means they will let up a lot of point and score a lot of points….in the end they are a .500 team. |
|
Tampa Bay Buccaneers |
I like John Gruden as a coach. Too bad this team is so bad. Jef Garcia will plug the gap this year and Cadillac will run better than he did last year, but in the end this team might have trouble winning 7 games. |
|
Tennessee Titans |
Vince Young will be the first player to avoid the Madden injury curse!! No I’m just kidding. He blows his ACL by game 3 |
|
Washington Redskins |
Oh the Redskins. This division is a killer so I don’t see them going very far. This team is young though and they do have some playmakers. They just need more of them. |
SUPER BOWL
Steelers VS Dallas and we WHOOP Dallas’s ass!!!! Come on, who did you
THINK I was gonna pick?!?!?
Topics: Dr. Johnny's Blog |
September 9th, 2007 at 4:48 pm
I want to know about the cheerleaders.
September 9th, 2007 at 10:12 pm
What about the Cardinals!! Oh yea…and the cheerleaders!! LOL
September 10th, 2007 at 3:19 pm
Not bad assessments, im not really a football fan outside of the console games
, bit hard to read though, hard to tell where each team’s text started and stopped.
-G
September 12th, 2007 at 4:18 am
Steelers in the super bowl??????what are you smoking